Contentment

What does it look like to be content? Does it mean happiness? Does it mean reaching goals and achieving success? Does contentment feel like we finally have arrived and checked off all the boxes we set out for ourselves in life? 

Or the question I find myself asking right now: is it wrong to not feel content?  Will I always be searching for more or will I ever feel like I understand the Apostle Paul’s teachings of what it means to be content in all circumstances? 

As a child, I thought being content meant that I didn’t want dessert after a meal! Ha! While comical, I think my childhood definition of contentment was actually spot on. At an early age, I understood that being content meant I was satisfied with what I had, and I didn’t want anything else. 

But there are big differences between wants and needs right?

I find myself in a season of knowing I don’t NEED anything else, yet I feel the yearning in my heart for WANTING something else. And right now, I’m not really sure what that something is. I believe that real contentment means having peace and being satisfied with what God has for me. Being truly content means that God is simply enough. Yet, I find myself wanting more. I’m not talking about material things, or wealth or success. What I desire is deeper than that. I want to know that my life makes a difference; that what I do matters. I desire to share my life alongside someone and to have authentic and trusting relationships with others. I want to know that I’m living out the call that God has on my life. 

So back to my question: is it wrong to be discontent?  If our contentment relies solely on materialism, wealth, success or even relationships, then it’s probably wrong-just my opinion. But if our discontent leads us on a journey of discovering Gods purpose for our life, then I personally think that it’s okay. 

It’s where I find myself today. If you find yourself here too, I want to encourage you. Embrace it, keep searching, keep discovering, figure out for yourself what it is that you desire and what Gods calling on your life might be. And ultimately, ask Him to help you be content no matter what. 

So how can we find contentment? I believe contentment is birthed from a grateful heart. Finding ways to be thankful in all things. No matter what we are going through, we do our best to look through the wider lens to see the bigger picture. Perspective.

I’m not saying that we need to be happy when pain comes, or to always look for the silver lining. There are circumstances in this life where there is absolutely NOTHING good about them. There is nothing good about the actual event of a miscarriage, or a fatal car wreck, a sickness or a cancer diagnosis, the loss of a job, a murder, an affair or any type of abuse, an addiction, an overdose, a natural disaster, ect. Pretending there is good IN these events can be a form of toxic positivity, which in turn will only dismiss the pain we feel. And if I have learned anything on my journey of healing, it’s that we must first FEEL the pain before we can start the process of moving forward. So, the question isn’t: how is my pain good, but rather: what good can come OUT of my pain?

I’m not thankful that I had to watch my son suffer through almost a year of chemotherapy and have his life changed forever. But I’m thankful that I can now relate to other moms who are walking similar paths who I can encourage, and they know I’ve been there.  I’m not thankful for the choices my boys’ dad made which resulted in their lives being uprooted, being forced to live between 2 houses, and the hardships they’ve endured as a result. But I’m thankful now I can relate to the hundreds of students at my school who come from split homes. I now have a better idea what some of those kids are going through. So, if I really believe what God says in his word, about being thankful in all things, then I have to believe I can be thankful for the heartache, pain and suffering that comes my way, knowing there is a bigger picture and purpose for it. 

1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 says, “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.” Always, continually, and in all circumstances.

So, what do we do with all of this? We can wallow in our pain for years and allow it to destroy us, or we can allow those heartaches to help others who go through similar circumstances, and to make a difference. That’s what we can be thankful for. And when we search after THAT, I think we will find ourselves closer to the kind of contentment Paul was referring to. 

I’m not there yet, but it’s where I want to be. 

What about you? Does your discontent have you wishing for more of what the world has to offer, or is it driving you to search deeper into what Gods purpose for your life might be? 

Keep going. Keep searching.  Keep growing.

-Tami

God help us to be content in all things. No matter what comes, no matter what doesn’t come- we want to be satisfied and at peace knowing you give us everything we need. You know the desires of our hearts and we ask that if it’s your will and is of you, that you would flood our lives with your blessings.